It has been an interesting summer, for sure. I have survived three weeks of VBS and a week of camp now, and I'm loving it although I'm not entirely sure I could ever do it again. One thing is for sure, though. After four weeks of being mostly "Willow", having people call me Maery again is weird.
I think it is funny how the things that you think are the least likely to change you tend to be the things that really help you learn more about yourself. I've spent the last year or so in a sort of spiritual limbo. I knew what I thought, and I sort of knew what the Bible said, but I didn't really bother to even try and place the two next to each other and compare. The conversations I've had this past week - most of which were either with Bryce while we were driving or with Melody when she wasn't sick - have taught me a lot about myself. I'm reading very slowly through Psalm 119 right now, and the one thing that has really struck me through every section is the idea of finding joy in the law.
I'm a teenager. Rules are lame, right? We're practically made to break them. And while it may be exhilarating to sneak out for skinny dipping or see a movie your mom told you not to see, God's law is a lot bigger than all of that. God's law is love, and what greater joy is there than being loved the way God loves us? In verse 24, both the NIV and the NASB refer to the Lord's commands as being delightful, and as counselors. I think that is SO incredible! Law doesn't seem like a friendly thing, especially not human law. There is so much in this one Psalm about God's love filling the earth completely, and how even when we feel our worst, God revives us with his love. Have you ever been feeling super low, and you get a hug or a smile or someone says "I love you" unexpectedly and suddenly, your day is amazing? God is continually saying "I love you", and if we are smart enough to listen, our whole life is improved!
In closing, Psalm 119:20 in NIV, NASB, and the Message, with added emphasis.
"My soul is consumed with longing for your laws at all times."
"My soul is crushed with longing after your ordinances at all times."
"My soul is starved and hungry, ravenous! - insatiable for your nourishing commands."
